Designer Nate Berkus says he thinks
about former boyfriend Fernando Bengoechea all the time.
Speaking to his former mentor, Oprah
Winfrey, in the second part of a two-part interview which aired
Sunday on cabler OWN's Super Soul Sunday, Berkus, 41,
explained why he dedicated his new design book, The Things That
Matter, to his late partner.
Berkus lost Bengoechea in 2004 while
the couple vacationed in Sri Lanka. Bengoechea, a photographer, is
presumed dead from a tsunami that hit the island country.
“You know I think about it all the
time,” Berkus said. “Where would we be had he survived? Would
we still be together? Would he have agreed with the decisions that
I've made since then in life? What would he think about who I am
today? 'Cause it's certainly different than who I was in 2004.”
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Berkus also said that surviving the
tsunami changed him and that he likes himself more today than before
the tragedy.
“I really don't recognize the person
that I was before the tsunami. And everything that I've learned from
that experience, really everything, I wouldn't trade. I really trust
myself. And like myself.”
The tsunami even affects his new
romance: “I see myself behaving in a way with my new boyfriend
that is fear based; that something will happen to him.”
(Related: Nate
Berkus says witnessing boyfriend disappearance was a gift.)